Anti-truth.org

It seems that more, and more you can't turn on the Television, or watch a movie without being bombarded with anti-smoking "Truth" advertisments. The latest shows a father driving his little girl to school in the back of a very "soccer mom"-type minivan, blowing bubbles that drift into the backseat for our hero's daughter to pop and giggle at. Then, superimposed over the happy girl is the slogan "End cigarette's infulence everywhere".

As I sat there, smoke ( from rage and my lit cigarette) pouring out of every opening on my body, I began to see connections to prohibition, in that it was a long, and ridiculous battle fought over the "moral majority" deciding what was good or bad for the botched and bungled masses. All they wanted was a good buzz, but the influence peddler's said "Nay" (Having already gotten their buzz).

Are there not worse things happening in the world today? Are there not more noble causes to invest your considerable time in? Well, I've come up with a few suggestions of my own, campaigns that I think might result in more than just you feeling superior to all us smokers by pointing your stubby little grease covered fingers in our faces. Here we go-

1) Imagine a bright, sunny afternoon in a park. Trees offering shade to adults unwrapping burgers from some fast-food chain, and laying them out on a picnic table next to mountains of fries as a narrator tells us in a child-like voice- "Fast food chains tell us that their low prices will save us money, and that soda is a hydrating liquid". Now enter the sizzling of a fresh coke as it's poured over ice, and a close up of some rich, bright red ketchup as golden brown fries are dipped into it. Now, the narrator tell us "They tell us that their food is good fun and brings the family together", a shot of children laughing on the playground fades to a poorly lit bedroom, where our narrator sits/lays on a stained matress, mushed between the splintered shards of what might have been a bedframe once, long ago. He is easily four hundred pounds and has a large bowl of mac and cheese on his belly as he tells us "But the reality is, you could end up looking like me". Super impose over his gut the slogan "End childhood obesity now."

2) Picture a barren, desert landscape. The sun beating mercilessly down on dry and cracked dirt, not a spec of greenery in sight. As the camera pans over the desolation, buildings come into veiw. Crumbling, half-gone shells of apartments, offices, schools and hospitals all riddled with bullet holes. The camera fades backwards to a small boy lying on the ground with only a loincloth on. He is obviously malnurished, cheek bones over pronounced, eye's sunken in, his ribs like a tiny sewer grate protruding from his mid-section. Just when you start to think that maybe these people are about to ask you for eighty-nine cents a week to help feed this poor kid, a combat boot steps on his head, crushing his skull, and a rifle swings into veiw bearing the American flag on it's ammo cartrige and the words "Let's roll" down the barrel. Super impose over the crushed head the slogan "End war now".

3) invision, if you will a thirty-something lay-about sitting comfortably in a leather reclining desk chair, a computer screen in front of him. To his right is a pack of Doritos, and an unopened jolt cola, to his left is a TV remote control, and a book he's never read, but enjoys the status having it on him brings. As he types away with feverish determination, a narrator tells us "This person has an axe to grind, deep down he feels like a failure, and wants to bring as many people down to his level as he can". Flash to a bar, it's winter, snow is falling and a couple hudles together outside while they smoke after a fun night out, behind them is a large red and white "NO SMOKING" sign on the window of the bar they just left. Zoom in past the "NO SMOKING" sign to inside the bar where four college kids are laughing and jingling car keys as they snort one last shot of whiskey up their nose's before they leave. Now the narrator tells us "Stem cell research promises new cures everyday, including cancer, however, it has yet to show any promise of resurecting the corpses of drunk driving victims". Flash back to our dejected writer as he smiles to himself in a decidely malicious fashion. Super impose over his sneer the slogan "End meaningless, non-profit orgs. now."